Archives for November 2008

Can the Enterprise take on a Star Destroyer?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v4ijDlbvAxw&eurl=http://www.toplessrobot.com/&feature=player_embedded
Ah, such awe-inspiring yumminess…

A Good Friend

The definition of a good friend is someone who will come over while you're recuperating from surgery and surprise you with a one-shot D&D adventure. Thank you, thank you! I played Zane von Ronzel, disgraced scion of wealth (a cross between Raef and Jezal dan Luthar) turned thief, in debt to the Red Fingers gang for some 5000 marks. A gestalt fighter 2/rogue 2.

I'm not the worst D&D player on earth, but I seriously am not the best. (Oh be quiet!) I'm not a tactical thinker either. (I said, be quiet!) Zane had his chance for a Big Score, so he scoped out the house. And opted to try to break in from the front gate.

OK, not too bright. Especially since I was rolling for crap that day. Since that approach didn't work, I opted for climbing the wall and entering through a front window. The family was supposed to be out at the opera, but I knew it wouldn't be as easy as that. Naturally I failed a crucial Reflex save and would've fallen had it not been for the lovely young daughter of the house who pulled me in. Actually, if not for her, Zane would've died really early on.

Romantic adventures ensued as I convinced her I was a dashing ne'er-do-well down on my luck, forced into thievery to regain my fortunes. She didn't completely believe that, but she was having fun. Then her nasty drunken cousin showed up. Glad I didn't enter his bedroom instead. I essentially killed him with my deadly rapier and main gauche attacks and left her to staunch the bleeding while I found the painting I'd come for.

Zane, you're not a good thief. At all. I failed Open Lock and Strength checks to get two doors open, fortunately avoiding the needle trap on one door. But at length I forced one of the doors open and found the creepy painting–a landscape of Hell. Complete with a booby-trapped frame. I began cutting it out after at last getting the idea to disarm the trap (see? not a great thief akshully), when I was rudely interrupted by an imp.

I HATE IMPS. Amazingly annoying, especially when you keep fumbling your Fort saves and getting poisoned by their #$%^ tails. And when you can't get past their damage resistance. At least Zane was clothed. (As I'm sure my faithful readers recall, Raef was naked when he faced an imp. Ouch. Adventurers should NOT sleep naked. Just sayin'.) If it hadn't been for Annalee's quick thinking (she'd make a great bandit queen, possibly), Zane would be another corpse to explain away. She threw a sheet over it, succeeding after several tries. I got away with the painting, one last kiss, and an open invitation to call again.

Although I only received 2000 marks for my trouble. Zane still has to come up with some more geld to prevent being mutilated by mobsters. Maybe he should form a quick liasion with Annalee. Or get the heck outta Dodge.

Despite my ineptitude, I had so much fun. Thanks again!

Devious Journal Entry


Nerf Maverick Steampunk Mod
by ~aimeekitty on deviantART

I can just see that as Lady Dianna Faraday-Smythe’s weapon. (Heiress and adventuress. At the dinner party establishing diplomatic relations between the Southwick Empire and Aquavania, a guest morphs into his true form—that of a Oceanian terrorist—right in the middle of the fish course, grasps the crown princess of Aquavania  around the throat with one stinger-tipped tentacle, and threatens her life if the diplomatic discussions are not broken off immediately. Lady Dianna frowns. “Good manners are the glue that binds society together—without them we are primitives.” Swift as thought she draws her specially modified Maverick and fires precisely at the only spot in which Oceanians are vulnerable—a spot centimeters from the princess’s head. Crisis averted. For now.)

Surgery on the Morrow

Ugh, liquid diet today.

Fun fact #1: Grape jello for breakfast is not so grate akshully.

Fun fact #2: As T reminded me, it's named JELLO for a reason, not Kool-Aid Gels. I shoulda bought the actual brand. I do loves me the grape, but…um…nope. Not in Kool-Aid version.

New Hampshire

Ah, am I happy to be going home tomorrow. I've been in Nashua, New Hampshire since Monday. It's not a bad place, but we traveled all day Monday, getting in about 7:30 p.m., then were in training all day, so I haven't seen any of it by daylight, except the distance from the hotel to the Ektron Training Center, a 5 minute walk. I did see some lovely yellow leaves on the ground yesterday that I scuffed through, but that's the extent of it. It rained all day today, and the temperature was in the upper 50s, so I don't think it was typical New England weather. Tomorrow my assistant and I drive back to the airport in Manchester by daylight, so maybe we'll see a little of the state.

I would believe that the results of Tuesday's election were a dream, were it not for yesterday's USA Today headlines exulting, "OBAMA WINS." Traveling is such a strange experience for me, as I always feel very out of touch. Ironic, that, since here I sit with a laptop and free internet at my disposal, as well as today's edition of the aforementioned candy-paper and a large flatscreen tv, but somehow none of it feels real without my familiar surroundings.

I did learn a new phrase, "All set?" Used by waitresses to ask if you had finished with your food. No one sneered, either, when told we were from Alabama.

The food here was good, although somewhat limited in its scope. I had fish and chips at Speaker's Corner, the hotel restaurant, the first night, served with huge onion rings. The next night we ventured to downtown Nashua (hilarious drive–me at the wheel, my assistant navigating, three male colleagues squished into the back of my rental Dodge Avenger trying to also navigate using an iPhone–I never made so many U-turns in my life) and ate at Michael Timothy's, a paneled, cozy place that features wood grilled pizzas. I had essentially a taco pizza with a very thin crust. Quite yummy, with a lovely salad. The next night dinner was across the street at Surf, owned by the same owner as the previous night's place. I managed only one U-turn this time, and had delicious crab cakes and another very nice field greens salad. Dessert this time–banana rum cake, with a fried plantain slice on top. Mmmm. Tonight we were all too tired to drive anywhere, so we ate in the hotel restaurant again. This time I ate New York sirloin, served on a pile of mashed potatoes, with steamed spinach in between, with fried onion straws (essentially) on top. Oh so good.

Lunches at Ektron training were very good as well. Chicken alfredo with penne pasta on Tuesday, chicken/corn/black bean enchildas on Wednesday and ricotta cheese/meat sauce in giant pasta shells today, all with yet more yummy salads. Excellent stuff.

I had delicious breakfasts in the hotel as well.

I have not slept well, though. Getting up early, going to bed early…Oh well.

I learned a lot. Now I'm an Ektron Certified Developer!