I hope by now you’re cruising along working on those positive thoughts and becoming a more positive and creative person overall. I’m sure you’re getting lots of encouragement and support from the people around you, and you’re well on your way towards reaching your various goals in life. You’re grabbing life by the horns and having a great time.
There’s something I need to prepare you for, and that’s critics and nay-sayers. They are all around us, and they love to bring us down. It can be a bit of a challenge to keep up your positive thinking and good attitude when someone else is actively trying to tear you down.
The most important thing you need to realize when you encounter these critics is that more often than not, it isn’t really about you. It’s more about them, their insecurities, and their resistance to change. Positive thinking is a good change and a big improvement to you, but it’s a problem for them. By watching you make those changes and share your positive thoughts and energy, you’re simply making them look bad.
When comparing themselves to you, they fall short. It’s easier to lash out and criticize you, than to step up and embrace positivity for themselves. The easy way out is to stop you. But you’re not going to let that happen, are you?
The first step is to realize and remind yourself of the fact that this isn’t about you as much as it is about them. For example, if you’re taking steps to change the culture of your workplace and make it an environment that fosters positive and creative thinking, you may be met with some resistance. You may find people on your team or even above you, resist and even ridicule the idea. Remember that it’s about resisting change on their part and not really about you.
Don’t empower these nay-sayers. Don’t let what they say bother you. Keep doing your thing and prove to them through actions and results that they are wrong. Don’t get into arguments. Nod, smile, and keep doing what you’re doing.
Find a cheerleader that you can turn to for encouragement and advice on those days when it’s hard to tune out the critics and nay-sayers. Tip the scales back in your favor and feel good about what you’re doing by getting support and encouragement. Grab your journal and prove to yourself how far you’ve come and how much you’ve changed for the better. Do whatever you need to do to get over the harsh words, and get back to what you were doing.
In the worst case scenario, it may be time to cut your worst critics out of your life. It isn’t always possible; it isn’t easy, but sometimes, it’s your best option. You may not be able to completely cut out your co-worker or a fellow department head, but you can limit your contact with them and do what you can to stay out of their toxic circle of influence.
A big part of positive thinking is taking ownership of your thoughts and actions. Don’t give that away. Keep control and don’t let those negative people bring you down. I promise it gets easier with practice.
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No matter how confident and courageous we become, we all have days when we feel less than our best. It’s normal to go through times when you struggle with self-esteem and confidence. Today’s confidence hack is all about creating a little tool that will help you get through those days and find your self-confidence again. The idea is simple. Make a list of your strengths, skills, and achievements that you can look back on whenever you need little confidence boost.
We all have people in our lives that act as cheerleaders and who are great for our self-esteem. We also often have people around us who bring us down. Or maybe it’s a particular place or situation that makes you feel inadequate or self-conscious. It’s important to be aware of these people, places, and situations that will bring you down. When you know who and what they are, you can guard against them and if possible avoid them.
It’s time for another confidence hack. Today is all about cultivating new habits. There’s nothing to boost your confidence like getting into the habit of doing something positive. I don’t care if it’s giving up coffee or smoking, hitting the gym each morning, or getting your most dreaded task out of the way by 10 am. We all have habits we would like to create that will improve our lives, our jobs, or at the very least make things easier for us. But establishing new habits isn’t always easy. In fact, it can be hard to get going. Which is where today’s confidence hack comes into play. I have a simple little strategy that you can deploy anytime you want to cultivate a new good habit.